Friendship in Adulthood

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September 23, 2014 by D.

Friendship was so much easier when proximity dictated relationships. You’re in the same class as your best friend and you’re guaranteed to see them at least five days a week. In college, you all live on campus and your best friend is just across the hall. Enter adulthood and friends are usually at least a 20 minute drive away. Lives get full, husbands and kids enter the picture, and 60 hour work weeks makes free time precious. That fleeting amount of free time makes friendships even more important.

Recently, my best friend hit a bump in her yearlong relationship with her boyfriend. After a brief period of separation, she realized that her life had been completely out of balance. She was fully immersed in her grad school and her boyfriend, at the detriment of every other element of her life. When her romantic relationship started floundering, she realized the importance of the other relationships that had been put on the sidelines. Her total focus on her romantic relationship meant that both her romantic relationship and her friendships suffered.

Without a doubt, maintaining friendships in adulthood is difficult. It takes effort, time, planning, and juggling other commitments. But when you stop doing the work, you end up losing the people you love. Your lose a support network, a way to destress, a family. Don’t get so caught up in your own life that you neglect to put time and energy into your friends.


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